The volcano has not erupted but yet collapsed into itself…..

All my fears, all my love, all my failure, all my dreams, slowly built up inside of me hoping to find a confiding friend. I stood at so many invisible glass doors waiting for friends to let me in so I would not have to stand in the bitter cold of loneliness. But yet I sit alone just me and my own weeping thoughts. I should have exploded, said I need help, told someone but I didn’t and now my heart could take no more. My soul could not bear the strain everlasting silence. Like a prisoner more willing to die than to live by body has shut down. I feel as though I am sitting in a shell. Me, my soul, my body are no longer one. Have I retracted myself so deep into my own being that the world seem miles away. I look at people and at the world but it seems so untouchable so far away. My eyes feel as though they were windows of a parlor with me standing far inside.

More than ever I need a friend to save, to break the wall around me, to save me from the silence.